论文总字数：35958字

摘 要

作为一种文化现象，婚姻是组成家庭并相应产生新的社会关系的基本形式。作为婚姻的重要组成部分，婚俗则体现了在不同的社会环境、历史、文化的影响下所反映出的不同的婚姻观和婚礼形式等。因此，通过研究婚俗以及婚俗的变化，我们可以更好地解读一国历史变迁和文化发展。

中美婚俗的差异可以从婚礼的准备、婚礼、婚宴、服装等方面体现。本文通过对中美婚礼习俗的对比来体现中西两种不同的文化差异，并进一步揭示在现代多元文化时代中西两种文化如何才能相互融合。最后，作者希望该论文能够帮助读者更好的了解中美婚俗和中西文化的同时，可以对当下的跨文化交际有所启迪。

关键词：婚礼习俗 文化差异 文化融合

1. Introduction

The present study consists of five chapters. Chapter One gives a brief introduction of the research, including the social background, the need for the study and the research direction. Chapter Two reviews the meaning of culture, marriage customs and cultural factors. Chapter Three presents Chinese marriage customs, American marriage customs, and the differences between them with detailed examples. Chapter Four, the most important part, highlights the paper to a deep level. By studying the connection between culture and marriage customs, this chapter presents cultural differences and integration between China and the West. Existing cross-cultural theories will be applied to figure out an appropriate way to solve the problems. Chapter Five will draw conclusions and point out the deficiencies and future research direction.

1.1 Need for the study

Different countries have different cultures, beliefs, and customs. Many of the most obvious differences can be discovered by comparing culture with culture, customs with customs. Marriage customs are one of the basic building blocks of culture. It plays an important role in cultural understanding and communication. As one of the most representative customs involved in culture, it can reveal much about individuals and societies’ beliefs, standards as well as core values.

Generally speaking, marriage customs can be reflected in preparation, wedding ceremony, and some preferences such as where to hold the ceremony, when to hold or what to say in the ceremony. For the individual, marriage means the combination of two persons. For the family, marriage means the birth of a new kinship. But for the whole country, marriage is a symbol of traditions, social thoughts, as well as cultural heritage. Based on these, research on marriage customs will make us understand better about traditions as well as cultures.

1.2 Research purpose

During the past two decades, with the rapid development of science and technology, great changes have taken place all over the world. Certain tendency of globalization brings increasing thinking exchanges and frequently multinational cultural communication. Different countries show cultural differences in the process of international cooperation and competition. Similarly, under the influence of cross-cultural communication, both Chinese and American marriage customs have changed a lot in recent years. In order to gain a better view of Chinese and Western cultural factors and limitations, more detailed examples and topics will be discussed in this paper.

In summary, this paper will not only give a glimpse of the differences of Chinese and American marriage customs but try to find out the way to integrate Chinese and Western culture. In this way, we can learn more about the western history and traditions, which is helpful for dealing with cultural problems and difficulties.

2. Literature Review

In this chapter, previous studies are reviewed in two parts, first on the marriage customs and second on cultural factors.

Researchers have done some researches related to marriage customs and culture. Under the background of modernization and globalization, marriage customs are changing from the traditional to modern one. Many scholars have focused on the traditional differences from different aspects. From the perspective of the changes of marriage customs, cultural integration seems to be an inevitable tendency.

2.1 Previous studies on marriage customs

Xi Xiao(2008) pointed out that the changing of marriage customs reflect a large field of the culture, the sense of value, the awareness of religion, nation and sex. Taking the factor of time into consideration, he listed both old marriage customs and the modern. By comparing two countries’ marriage customs in different periods, analyzing the special historical background of, he believed that different cultural backgrounds result in different marriage customs.

Concerned with differences of marriage customs, some scholars try to see the differences by comparison of some common wedding customs through different perspectives. For instance, Ma Fangqin(2012), comparing and studying superficially from wedding location, wedding ceremony and wedding dress of traditional Chinese and Western countries, held that those differences were mainly caused by different living conditions, core values, religious beliefs, and economic systems.

Pan Wenjin(2008) compared marriage customs from the aspects of entire image, ceremony, dressing, and wedding party. In his paper, based on different marriage concepts, the Chinese treat marriage as a tie between two families. Only if both man and woman get their parents’ permission will they be married. While Americans believes that nobody could interfere the freedom of marriage. He thinks that different cultural traditions lead to different marriage customs. Nowadays, with the extensive cultural conflicts and integration, Chinese and Western marriage customs have been blended into new cultural factors.

2.2 Previous studies on cultural factors

According to Charles Mitchell(2008), a formal definition about culture is that culture is a set of learned core values, beliefs, standards, knowledge, morals, laws, and behaviors. A society’s culture is passed from generation to generation, and aspects such as religion, customs are interrelated.

In the book Intercultural Communication Research, Jia Yuxin(1997) believed that the culture is the combination of a set of thoughts, behaviors, perception and words. Because of different local ecology and natural environment, it will create one’s own unique culture and form the special cultural patterns.

Xue Yuan(2013) have tried to illustrate the importance of religious factors hidden behind different marriage customs. Religious beliefs and traditions have a great influence on human’s behaviour and thinking. China, under the function of Confucianism, seems to be relatively feudal and conservative. In contrast, Christianity promotes a kind of free marriage. To some extent, social beings determine social consciousness. Based on different historical and geographical factors, it comes different thinking patterns, beliefs, customs and cultures. That is to say, with the development and integration of China and the West, marriage customs can change accordingly.

Previous researchers have shown that differences of marriage customs between China and America are mostly reflected in the comparison of preparation, wedding ceremony, dressing, and some special preferences. Based on the above materials which have provided a good understanding of the importance of marriage customs to cross-cultural communication, this paper intend to focus on how different customs reflect different cultures. Meanwhile, this paper will figure out a logical way to solve cross-cultural problems under the background of global cultural communication and integration.

3. Chinese and American Marriage Customs

This chapter introduces in detail parts of Chinese and American marriage customs. Chinese marriage customs, American marriage customs and the differences between them will be presented in this part.

3.1 Chinese marriage customs

Chinese marriage customs are varied and complex because China is a vast country. As time goes by, those customs or traditions have evolved and changed as a result of regional and cultural influences. During the centuries of Chinese historical evolution, marriage customs have developed from the traditional to modern. Social development always accompanies with the change of thought and social customs. In the ancient traditions, marriage customs date back to Zhou Dynasty. That is also the important era for Chinese social transition from slavery to feudal system. After the fall of the last feudal privileges, Qing Dynasty, China began to accept western culture and thoughts. Due to frequent communication, especially after China carried out reform and open policy, Chinese society has also changed a lot. Of course, the impact of those western elements on our life has been reflected in many aspects, including marriage customs.

3.1.1 Wedding preparation

Both ancient and modern Chinese marriage customs consist of the preparation, ceremony, and other procedures. During the process of the wedding preparation, a set of customs form the basis. Known as “Three Letters and Six Etiquette,” the agreement between two families means an entire marriage procedures and also a new birth family.

“Three Letters and Six Etiquette,” carried forward for more than two thousand years, is essential and core in ancient marriage cultures. Therefore, it plays an important role in the wedding customs. Three Letters is made up of three letters: a letter of appointment, a letter of presents list and a letter of escorting. The letter of appointment refers to the announcement of engagement. The groom’s family send this letter to the bride’s family. The letter of presents list is sent by the groom’s family accompanied with a more formal collection presents. However, the letter of escorting is sent by the bride’s family on the wedding day. That is three letters exchanged between the groom and the bride’s families. With all communications by formal three letters, the act of the marriage will be confirmed.

Six Etiquette is also a necessary procedure of the wedding preparation. It refers to six customs concluding an emissary’s requesting for marriage, requesting the bride’s birth date and time, the betrothal, more gifts, selecting an auspicious date and the wedding ceremony before the groom and the bride are married. The first step is sending an emissary as the representative of groom’s family who aims at persuading the bride’s family of the groom’s interest. Second, requesting the bride’s birth date and time is needed. A fortune teller will be asked to decide if the couple is a good match. After these, if the couple is a good match, the groom’s family will send presents to the bride’s family. The forth step is more formal gifts. Fifth, selecting an auspicious wedding date. Finally, on the wedding day, the groom fetches the bride from her family and brings her to his family. When the bride has been taken to groom’s family, the couple serves tea to groom’s elders followed by a ceremony banquet under the relatives and friends’ blessing. All relatives, friends and others who witness their marriage will celebrate it through a wedding party.

3.1.2 Wedding ceremony

Chinese wedding ceremony, with the impression of happiness and jollification, posses an important place in the whole process of marriage. Wedding decoration, dressing, color and hair combing ceremony are obvious characteristics on the wedding day. Both groom and bride’s house will be decorated in red because the Chinese believe that red represents happiness and prosperity. Everywhere is full of red banner, red treasure box, red tablecloths, dresses and much more. Double happiness stickers also will be decorated on all wedding items such as main doors and windows. The whole plate of peanuts and jujubes will be decorated symbolizing the wish that the couple can have their own child soon.

Since Chinese worship Heaven and Earth, as part of the wedding ceremony, groom wearing red flowers in front of of the body and bride wearing red silk dresses bow to Heaven and Earth hoping best wishes. As Chinese consider family first, the groom and bride will bow to their elders. At the end of the ceremony, the groom’s parents will give fortune to the bride to announce the joyous event. Then the couple will be sent to bridal chamber followed by the wedding party. The wedding party plays many tricks about the couple. All this is in good fun.The party provides an opportunity to repay past kindnesses of family members and friends. It’s also regarded as a way to renew good fortune and happiness of the whole family.

3.1.3 Changes from ancient to modern

Due to the influences of Western culture, to some extent, Chinese marriage customs have changed from ancient to modern with the frequent communication between the East and the West. Many traditional procedures are still followed by couples nowadays. “ Three Letters and Six Etiquette,” is still considered essential and core for centuries. However, many other procedures and rituals are not often performed at present. Some Chinese-style items have been gradually mixed with Western-style elements. The elements of color, dressing and wedding ceremony place have changed a lot.

Generally, modern Chinese marriage customs have developed into three procedures: engagement, giving gifts and wedding ceremony. Both men and women have freedom to choose their spouse. In the part of preparation, more families tend to choose to consult a Chinese calendar to determine the good date and time. In place of the single color, the Western-style white gown becomes more and more popular. In place of the groom’s house, sometimes families choose the church or hotel as the wedding place.

3.2 American marriage customs

Generally speaking, American-style marriage contains the religious marriage, the common custom marriage and the common law marriage. As the name suggests, the religious marriage, a traditional and universal type in America, is held in in the church with a paster. The common custom marriage is managed by officer in the place where the marriage certificate is received. The common law marriage has never needed to receive a certificate or hold a rite. However, America has few traditional marriage customs. They all almost consist of engagement, bridal shower, bachelor party, girl’s party, wedding ceremony and wedding party. All these basically form the marriage customs of America.

Before getting married, what comes first is the engagement. With the permission to marry the girl of girl’s father, the couple will decide together that the date and the place to get married. As there is no specific wedding engagement traditions, a diamond ring which is used to settle an important agreement is supposed to be the most representative thing. Sometimes they host an engagement party.

Bridal shower, hosted by bride’s family and closest friends, traditionally involves give gifts to future wives and husbands.

Bachelor party hosted by groom’s closest friends and attended by groom’s friends. The girl’s party resides by brides’s closest friends and attended by bride’s friends.

When a couple marries, the usual place for a wedding is in a church. Others may choose outdoors in a scenic spot decorated by their own style. You have probably heard the saying: “something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue, a silver sixpence inside your shoe.” Besides, the wedding dress the bride wears is usually believed to have to be white which symbolizes purity. As the ceremony begins, the groom stands with minister waiting for the entrance of the beautiful bride. Traditionally before exchanging rings, the couple promise to love each other with the announcement of the minister. “Yes, I do.” Those three words stand for that they have already been married. Then the couple cut the wedding cake and feed each other a bite. During the wedding party, all the family members, co-workers and friends are celebrating the happy big event. Towards the end of the party, the bride will ask unmarried women to stand in line. Finally the bride will throw the bouquet to those unmarried women aiming at choosing the next fortunate bride.

3.3 The comparison of differences in marriage customs between China and America

As to the differences of Chinese and American marriage customs, they are all reflected in the procedures of preparation, wedding ceremony and wedding party. From the overall impression of Chinese and American marriage customs, it is obvious that there are many differences on virous aspects such as the purpose of marriage, freedom, decoration, giving gifts, atmosphere and the wedding form.

Different from America, the form of wedding engagement in China often performs as Three Letters. It is mostly arranged by matchmakers or groom and bride’s parents but not the youths themselves. Betrothal gift or treasures is a necessary affair before the appointment of engagement. While in America it is always an engagement party and an wedding engagement ring. Both men and women have right to choose whether, when and where they will get married.

The way selecting the date of the marriage is completely different between China and America. Chinese marriage date and time are mostly depended on fortune teller’s forecast. And many families choose to consult a Chinese calendar to decide a good day for marriage. However, the famous rhyme “Monday for wealth, Tuesday for health, Wednesday the very best day of all, Thursday will soon be counting losses, Friday for funerals, Saturday for no luck at all ” in western countries advised the best wedding day in the first half of the week.

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